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Thursday, December 14. 2006
Shells First Submission to Parent Hacks
Shell has submitted to parent hacks awhile ago, and they finally ran one of her submissions. Probably one of her best by far.
Whute! Good job baby!
Whute! Good job baby!
Friday, November 17. 2006
Who likes the little duckies in the pond? Harmony!
I've been singing Harmony the ducky song lately... you know, the ducky song from Ze Frank:
Yay fun!
Who likes the little duckies in the pond?and Shell recorded it on video. I posted it to the Intros section on the gallery, and turned my daughter into a star. Of sorts.
I do, I do, I do
A chick-a quack quack!
Yay fun!
Saturday, October 21. 2006
Shells Parent Hacks Core Dump
Jonnays Note: Shell posted a bunch of hints and tips to Parent Hacks, or a site that was linked there, and I thought I would cross post it here as well, cause they are that good.
I get an empty journal book for the child every year. I tape or glue memory stuff in there like pamphlets from the zoo, birthday cards, swim lessons certificates etc. I put the dates on them and the dates on important things that happened that year. The rest of the book is open for the child to fill. It is a keepsake and teaches the child to keep a journal or sketchbook which is an important skill at any age.
There is nothing like opening a present on Christmas Eve. A taster for the next morning. I get my kids Christmas pajamas that they can open on Christmas Eve so they are festive for the morning.
Instead of making bottles up ahead of time, I put the powder in a bottle, then when it is time for baby to have bottle, just add warm water. You don't have to keep the bottles in the fridge or cooler, and you don't have to heat it up.
I have a sure fire way of getting a child to sleep through the night at a very early age. Pick a simple short book (Sandra boynton is great) and make that the last thing before you put the child in bed and only at night, never for nap. Do this from a very early age, I started at 3 weeks. This book becomes the cue for bedtime. The child knows what to expect. We did this with my daughter since she was 3 weeks old till she was about 1 1/2. She has always been a great sleeper.
When my kids would fight or have a hard time learning something I would tell them the special bedtime stories. I would change their names just slightly and tell them a story about these kids. I would change the details slightly about the issue they were dealing with. They would get involved in the story and I would ask them questions about how the kids in the story should deal with the issue. They would come up with solutions looking at it from an outsider point of view, which is easier to do without having the emotional aspect to deal with as well. They were able to see both sides. Then I thought these were the last thoughts in their heads before they went to bed so maybe it would sink in. It really seemed to work.
Making bottles ahead of time can be a hassle. I found if I used the gravy maker from Tupperware it was much easier. It has markings on it for the water. Close it up and shake and put it in the fridge.
Instead of babyproofing everything, I leave stuff on the shelves and tables within reach that is adult only but safe and not breakable. When baby starts to play with the items at an early age I teach them no. I say no, that they aren't allowed to play with it and remove them from the temptation. It is almost enough to drive you crazy for a long time, but if you stick to it, they learn at a very early age. I can take my daughter anywhere and people don't have to start moving things as soon as the child walks into their house.
When the child shares I make a big deal out of it. Tell them how wonderful it is that they are sharing with plenty of clapping. They learn that sharing is not something to get upset about, but rather it is something fun that makes everyone happy.
I have a hard time bathing the child in the bathtub. I get a backache leaning over. When the baby is small enough, till they are about 1 or even more, I bath them in the kitchen sink.
When feeding baby I give the baby a spoon of their own so they learn how to use it early.
Don't hide the small arguements from the child. Do it without anger and let them see the resolution as well so that they can learn how do deal with negatives.
Remember that the child is not doing whatever it is that is making you angry "to you" or to be bad. Try to understand "why" they are doing it. For instance, if the child is throwing food on the floor they might be doing it cause it made a really neat sound. This doesn't mean that they are allowed to do it, but it will help with the way you deal with it without anger.
Say please and thank you, sorry and your welcome on a regular basis. You won't have to spend alot of time teaching your child this, they will pick it up from watching you.
I find that if they child has boundries they are much happier. They don't have the skills or the need to make decisions. However, flexibility is just as important. Sometimes, they need to feel that they have a say in what is going on.
I get an empty journal book for the child every year. I tape or glue memory stuff in there like pamphlets from the zoo, birthday cards, swim lessons certificates etc. I put the dates on them and the dates on important things that happened that year. The rest of the book is open for the child to fill. It is a keepsake and teaches the child to keep a journal or sketchbook which is an important skill at any age.
There is nothing like opening a present on Christmas Eve. A taster for the next morning. I get my kids Christmas pajamas that they can open on Christmas Eve so they are festive for the morning.
Instead of making bottles up ahead of time, I put the powder in a bottle, then when it is time for baby to have bottle, just add warm water. You don't have to keep the bottles in the fridge or cooler, and you don't have to heat it up.
I have a sure fire way of getting a child to sleep through the night at a very early age. Pick a simple short book (Sandra boynton is great) and make that the last thing before you put the child in bed and only at night, never for nap. Do this from a very early age, I started at 3 weeks. This book becomes the cue for bedtime. The child knows what to expect. We did this with my daughter since she was 3 weeks old till she was about 1 1/2. She has always been a great sleeper.
When my kids would fight or have a hard time learning something I would tell them the special bedtime stories. I would change their names just slightly and tell them a story about these kids. I would change the details slightly about the issue they were dealing with. They would get involved in the story and I would ask them questions about how the kids in the story should deal with the issue. They would come up with solutions looking at it from an outsider point of view, which is easier to do without having the emotional aspect to deal with as well. They were able to see both sides. Then I thought these were the last thoughts in their heads before they went to bed so maybe it would sink in. It really seemed to work.
Making bottles ahead of time can be a hassle. I found if I used the gravy maker from Tupperware it was much easier. It has markings on it for the water. Close it up and shake and put it in the fridge.
Instead of babyproofing everything, I leave stuff on the shelves and tables within reach that is adult only but safe and not breakable. When baby starts to play with the items at an early age I teach them no. I say no, that they aren't allowed to play with it and remove them from the temptation. It is almost enough to drive you crazy for a long time, but if you stick to it, they learn at a very early age. I can take my daughter anywhere and people don't have to start moving things as soon as the child walks into their house.
When the child shares I make a big deal out of it. Tell them how wonderful it is that they are sharing with plenty of clapping. They learn that sharing is not something to get upset about, but rather it is something fun that makes everyone happy.
I have a hard time bathing the child in the bathtub. I get a backache leaning over. When the baby is small enough, till they are about 1 or even more, I bath them in the kitchen sink.
When feeding baby I give the baby a spoon of their own so they learn how to use it early.
Don't hide the small arguements from the child. Do it without anger and let them see the resolution as well so that they can learn how do deal with negatives.
Remember that the child is not doing whatever it is that is making you angry "to you" or to be bad. Try to understand "why" they are doing it. For instance, if the child is throwing food on the floor they might be doing it cause it made a really neat sound. This doesn't mean that they are allowed to do it, but it will help with the way you deal with it without anger.
Say please and thank you, sorry and your welcome on a regular basis. You won't have to spend alot of time teaching your child this, they will pick it up from watching you.
I find that if they child has boundries they are much happier. They don't have the skills or the need to make decisions. However, flexibility is just as important. Sometimes, they need to feel that they have a say in what is going on.
Monday, October 2. 2006
Just in case there was any doubt
I love you Shell.
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Tuesday, September 19. 2006
Burning Man 06 - The Art
This year the Burning Man Arts Foundation did things a little differently. They cut back on the grants to the large rave camps and gave more to the art. You could totally tell a difference. I have never been so amazed as I was this year by the art. Don't get me wrong, the art at Burningman is always amazing, but my jaw was dropping several times throughout the week.
The first thing I heard about was the Belgian Waffle. Zac told me it was going to be the biggest fire on the playa ever. Bigger than the man, bigger than the temple. The thing about the waffle, was that it wasn't called the waffle. It was actually called Uchronia. It got the nickname and it stuck. I was walking back from the man one night by myself and was joined by a guy that started talking to me. We were discussing the name of the waffle and how no one seems to know it's real name. While we were discussing it, we were stopped by a couple. They asked us to help them. "He thinks the waffle looks like a bear, I think it looks like a snake, what do you think?" My new found friend and I started laughing because they confirmed what we were just discussing. I told them I thought it looked like a big green fan.
I saw it during the day and wasn't really awestruck by it. It was big. It was cool. But just not that amazing. This has happened a couple of times in the past. I come home then read about something online that I had seen there and think, damn, why didn't I pay more attention to that! The waffle is just like that. It wasn't actually funded by the organization. The two artists funded the project themselves. Turns out, they are actually from Belgian. They brought together a well rounded group of people from Belgian to build it. From factory workers to artists where everyone was empowered to be creative with it and build it together. All from low-quality Canadian wood destined for recycling.
When the waffle was burning we were at our camp ready to leave and go home. We were probably around 3km from the fire and we couldn't believe the size of the fire and the size of the dust devils coming out of it.
I found the man to be a little odd this year. He seemed really small. Maybe it was because he went up and down and always seemed to be down. The inside of the base of the man is usually quite a bit of fun. This year most of the rooms were really empty. The whole base was done in an art deco theme. The entrance at the back of the man had several pieces of art by Alex Grey. Pieces that I spent ALOT of time staring at. He was at Burning Man this year camped at Entheon Village that I will touch on soon. There was another room that was a game. I wasn't so much interested in the game as I was with the art. It was large scale art with smaller scale art drawn on top. Beautiful.
I wasn't all that happy with the temple as I have been every other year. Every other year I am awestruck by it's beauty. David Best used to make the temple from left over pieces of dinosaur puzzles. He would make the temple one foot shorter than the man and they were intricate pieces of art. Last year Mark Grieves took over for David and made a beautiful pagoda style temple that wasn't as tall as the temple usually is, but it was moving and beautiful. This year, it lacked. It was small to scale and just not...pretty. Dull really. But, it didn't stop from helping people to express what they needed to express. I wrote my thoughts to who I needed to and cried. There was a flute player there that added to the whole experience. I had a moment with the person next to me at the temple while I was chilling. Things that Burning Man is built on, to bond with a stranger for a fleeting moment, but to remember it forever.
One night while we were wandering the esplanade and the desert we saw fire in the distance. We had seen it all night and our eyes were drawn to it. It was alot of fire. Fire! So off we went. What I experienced there was amazing and kind of scary. Too much stimulation. It was a big party. A big party being held in the midst of a 168 foot long serpent coiled around a burning egg. Oh, but it was much more than that. Each vertebrae of the spine was on fire and would shoot flames. Oh, but even more than that, the head of the serpent was moving up and down and around, the fangs were on fire. We were standing below the head as I was mesmerized by it. There was a heavy bass beat to the left of me and a heavy bass beat to the right. I was squeezed between so many people dancing. The flames shooting into the sky all around. The only thing that kept me sane was Rad's hand hanging onto mine. Unbelievable.
Another favorite piece was in front of center cafe. There were 3 women all made of metal rings. Each was in a different form of prayer. One woman was on her knees with her hands together in prayer. At night, she had a fire burning in her heart. The middle one was standing with her hand raised to the heavens. At night, her hands were on fire. The last one was on her hands and knees. At night she cried tears of fire. This one was my favorite. I loved the tears. You could be guaranteed to see someone standing behind her doing all sorts of dirty things to her. They were truly amazing.
The operation table was back this year. I hadn't seen it in the past but it was on our street this year. It was a life size operation game table. You use metal tongs to get the bits out of the table and you got zapped if you missed. They added a new element to it though. You could try to get the man out of the mind. If you missed though, you got buzzed and spanked with a paddle. If you got it, you got to spank them with the paddle. Good fun.
I'm not sure if I should even be mentioning this in the Art writeup, but it was beautiful. There are always big lasers. I could usually care less about them. This year though, I forget who thought to do it, but one of our crew grabbed a handful of playa and threw it up at the laser that was just above his head. The playa hit it and it looked like it exploded in green diamonds. It was sooooo beautiful. We stayed there for a long time, everyone throwing playa up in the air. The cool thing was that others saw it and stopped to do it as well. Then while they were doing it, others stopped while we were walking away. I wonder how long that went on for.
Like I mentioned earlier Alex Grey was camped at Entheon Village. This was an amazing place. They had a couple of galleries that had the most amazing art. Not even the art, but the tent that it was displayed in. I was blown away by the detail they put into it. They had a meditation tent that I almost fell asleep in. It was a round tent with bedding on a raised section all around the edge. Great minimal music and warmth. The big tent again had amazing art and lighting. They had talks and showed movies.
There was a brightly colored balloon that looked like a venus flytrap. I loved the colors and the way it waved in the wind so gently. I had heard about it before I went down there and was looking forward to it. When I went to see it I was rewarded with a great site. There was a little girl sitting on part of the piece. I loved how she was awed by it. Made me miss my little girl. Harmony would have loved it.
Out in the middle of the playa, in the dark was a box. The box was about 6 feet tall and 2 or 3 feet wide. The depth was about half a foot. When you looked into it at the front though, it was lit up around the edges and looked like it was a really long tunnel that you couldn't see the end of. It was an endless mirror. I was blown away by it in the state that I was in. It took forever for Rad to explain it to me before I got it. I thought it was freakin magic!
This one is kind of hard to explain. But from a distance it looked like a wall of lights that changes colors and designs. This kind of piece is not uncommon there so I really didn't think much of it. That is, until we went right up to it. This is where it differs. It was a circle of lights. There was a center pole with lights strung from the center to the outer ring of the circle around that pole. There was about 20 strings from the ground up. The lights would change from the center to the outside. Really hard to explain. But it was amazing the effect they made from it.
Even around home art was to be found. The street signs themselves were art this year. Every other year they are just white rectangles with black writing. This year they put alot more thought into them. They were really pretty. I begged Rad to go find me a sign Saturday afternoon. I wanted the one that said Hope. He had to go 6 blocks before he could find one that wasn't taken yet. Thanks Rad!
We even did a little bit of art ourselves. I had a great idea to do a bus stop this year. My plan was to build a bus shelter that people could use to get out of the elements and perhaps art cars would stop at. It was a project that we eneded up downsizing. I asked Troy and Tania if they could take care of it. So they brought a bench and I grabbed some fun fur in our camp colors. I took Sean's bus stop design and tweaked it and Troy and Tania got it printed on metal. They even bought an extra sign for it. It got used quite a bit, art cars even stopped. It was fun.
I'm not much of an art car kind of girl. I've tried every year to jump on an art car but I just don't have fun on them. There are some cool ones that I have seen in the past. Now though, someone has raised the bar. A 3 story victorian mansion on wheels. This mansion was being pulled by a real steam engine. Again, I had heard of this ahead of time, but reading about and seeing it was something entirely different. I saw it at night when it crossed my path. The steam engine was a fully functional 1920's steam engine that was lit up with flames at night. The mansion was a beautiful replica. When I saw it, they had people in the mansion that made it seem that much more real. There was a soldier in the back that stared straight ahead and never moved. One window there was a woman in victorian garb hanging out the window shouting. From the top window was people dressed amazingly like ghosts waving in the wind. Excuse my language, but it was fucking incredible.
This is all I can think of at the moment, but it is not uncommon for the memories to keep flooding back in for long afterwards. There might just be another "Art" blog.
Thanks to my campmates for some of the photos and to the people of flickr!
The first thing I heard about was the Belgian Waffle. Zac told me it was going to be the biggest fire on the playa ever. Bigger than the man, bigger than the temple. The thing about the waffle, was that it wasn't called the waffle. It was actually called Uchronia. It got the nickname and it stuck. I was walking back from the man one night by myself and was joined by a guy that started talking to me. We were discussing the name of the waffle and how no one seems to know it's real name. While we were discussing it, we were stopped by a couple. They asked us to help them. "He thinks the waffle looks like a bear, I think it looks like a snake, what do you think?" My new found friend and I started laughing because they confirmed what we were just discussing. I told them I thought it looked like a big green fan.
I saw it during the day and wasn't really awestruck by it. It was big. It was cool. But just not that amazing. This has happened a couple of times in the past. I come home then read about something online that I had seen there and think, damn, why didn't I pay more attention to that! The waffle is just like that. It wasn't actually funded by the organization. The two artists funded the project themselves. Turns out, they are actually from Belgian. They brought together a well rounded group of people from Belgian to build it. From factory workers to artists where everyone was empowered to be creative with it and build it together. All from low-quality Canadian wood destined for recycling.
When the waffle was burning we were at our camp ready to leave and go home. We were probably around 3km from the fire and we couldn't believe the size of the fire and the size of the dust devils coming out of it.
Click to view larger images | ||
I found the man to be a little odd this year. He seemed really small. Maybe it was because he went up and down and always seemed to be down. The inside of the base of the man is usually quite a bit of fun. This year most of the rooms were really empty. The whole base was done in an art deco theme. The entrance at the back of the man had several pieces of art by Alex Grey. Pieces that I spent ALOT of time staring at. He was at Burning Man this year camped at Entheon Village that I will touch on soon. There was another room that was a game. I wasn't so much interested in the game as I was with the art. It was large scale art with smaller scale art drawn on top. Beautiful.
Click to view larger images | ||
I wasn't all that happy with the temple as I have been every other year. Every other year I am awestruck by it's beauty. David Best used to make the temple from left over pieces of dinosaur puzzles. He would make the temple one foot shorter than the man and they were intricate pieces of art. Last year Mark Grieves took over for David and made a beautiful pagoda style temple that wasn't as tall as the temple usually is, but it was moving and beautiful. This year, it lacked. It was small to scale and just not...pretty. Dull really. But, it didn't stop from helping people to express what they needed to express. I wrote my thoughts to who I needed to and cried. There was a flute player there that added to the whole experience. I had a moment with the person next to me at the temple while I was chilling. Things that Burning Man is built on, to bond with a stranger for a fleeting moment, but to remember it forever.
Click to view larger images | ||
One night while we were wandering the esplanade and the desert we saw fire in the distance. We had seen it all night and our eyes were drawn to it. It was alot of fire. Fire! So off we went. What I experienced there was amazing and kind of scary. Too much stimulation. It was a big party. A big party being held in the midst of a 168 foot long serpent coiled around a burning egg. Oh, but it was much more than that. Each vertebrae of the spine was on fire and would shoot flames. Oh, but even more than that, the head of the serpent was moving up and down and around, the fangs were on fire. We were standing below the head as I was mesmerized by it. There was a heavy bass beat to the left of me and a heavy bass beat to the right. I was squeezed between so many people dancing. The flames shooting into the sky all around. The only thing that kept me sane was Rad's hand hanging onto mine. Unbelievable.
Click to view larger images | ||
Another favorite piece was in front of center cafe. There were 3 women all made of metal rings. Each was in a different form of prayer. One woman was on her knees with her hands together in prayer. At night, she had a fire burning in her heart. The middle one was standing with her hand raised to the heavens. At night, her hands were on fire. The last one was on her hands and knees. At night she cried tears of fire. This one was my favorite. I loved the tears. You could be guaranteed to see someone standing behind her doing all sorts of dirty things to her. They were truly amazing.
Click to view larger images | ||
The operation table was back this year. I hadn't seen it in the past but it was on our street this year. It was a life size operation game table. You use metal tongs to get the bits out of the table and you got zapped if you missed. They added a new element to it though. You could try to get the man out of the mind. If you missed though, you got buzzed and spanked with a paddle. If you got it, you got to spank them with the paddle. Good fun.
I'm not sure if I should even be mentioning this in the Art writeup, but it was beautiful. There are always big lasers. I could usually care less about them. This year though, I forget who thought to do it, but one of our crew grabbed a handful of playa and threw it up at the laser that was just above his head. The playa hit it and it looked like it exploded in green diamonds. It was sooooo beautiful. We stayed there for a long time, everyone throwing playa up in the air. The cool thing was that others saw it and stopped to do it as well. Then while they were doing it, others stopped while we were walking away. I wonder how long that went on for.
Like I mentioned earlier Alex Grey was camped at Entheon Village. This was an amazing place. They had a couple of galleries that had the most amazing art. Not even the art, but the tent that it was displayed in. I was blown away by the detail they put into it. They had a meditation tent that I almost fell asleep in. It was a round tent with bedding on a raised section all around the edge. Great minimal music and warmth. The big tent again had amazing art and lighting. They had talks and showed movies.
Click to view larger images | ||
There was a brightly colored balloon that looked like a venus flytrap. I loved the colors and the way it waved in the wind so gently. I had heard about it before I went down there and was looking forward to it. When I went to see it I was rewarded with a great site. There was a little girl sitting on part of the piece. I loved how she was awed by it. Made me miss my little girl. Harmony would have loved it.
Click to view larger images | ||
Out in the middle of the playa, in the dark was a box. The box was about 6 feet tall and 2 or 3 feet wide. The depth was about half a foot. When you looked into it at the front though, it was lit up around the edges and looked like it was a really long tunnel that you couldn't see the end of. It was an endless mirror. I was blown away by it in the state that I was in. It took forever for Rad to explain it to me before I got it. I thought it was freakin magic!
This one is kind of hard to explain. But from a distance it looked like a wall of lights that changes colors and designs. This kind of piece is not uncommon there so I really didn't think much of it. That is, until we went right up to it. This is where it differs. It was a circle of lights. There was a center pole with lights strung from the center to the outer ring of the circle around that pole. There was about 20 strings from the ground up. The lights would change from the center to the outside. Really hard to explain. But it was amazing the effect they made from it.
Even around home art was to be found. The street signs themselves were art this year. Every other year they are just white rectangles with black writing. This year they put alot more thought into them. They were really pretty. I begged Rad to go find me a sign Saturday afternoon. I wanted the one that said Hope. He had to go 6 blocks before he could find one that wasn't taken yet. Thanks Rad!
We even did a little bit of art ourselves. I had a great idea to do a bus stop this year. My plan was to build a bus shelter that people could use to get out of the elements and perhaps art cars would stop at. It was a project that we eneded up downsizing. I asked Troy and Tania if they could take care of it. So they brought a bench and I grabbed some fun fur in our camp colors. I took Sean's bus stop design and tweaked it and Troy and Tania got it printed on metal. They even bought an extra sign for it. It got used quite a bit, art cars even stopped. It was fun.
I'm not much of an art car kind of girl. I've tried every year to jump on an art car but I just don't have fun on them. There are some cool ones that I have seen in the past. Now though, someone has raised the bar. A 3 story victorian mansion on wheels. This mansion was being pulled by a real steam engine. Again, I had heard of this ahead of time, but reading about and seeing it was something entirely different. I saw it at night when it crossed my path. The steam engine was a fully functional 1920's steam engine that was lit up with flames at night. The mansion was a beautiful replica. When I saw it, they had people in the mansion that made it seem that much more real. There was a soldier in the back that stared straight ahead and never moved. One window there was a woman in victorian garb hanging out the window shouting. From the top window was people dressed amazingly like ghosts waving in the wind. Excuse my language, but it was fucking incredible.
Click to view larger images | |||
This is all I can think of at the moment, but it is not uncommon for the memories to keep flooding back in for long afterwards. There might just be another "Art" blog.
Thanks to my campmates for some of the photos and to the people of flickr!
Monday, September 18. 2006
Needs, wants, desires and relationship interactions.
I've been meaning to write about this for a long time. With the help of my wife and some deep thinking about my goals (sparked by "Getting Things Done" of course) I came to the realization that I have a hard time with my wants and desires. In fact, I have for a long time. The difficulty is that I have a hard time articulating my desires to myself, let alone to my wife—or anyone else for that matter. In fact, it is a frequent occurence that I will walk into a Chapters or Indigo, spend an hour browsing books, and come up with nothing I want to read.
So when I came to this realization, I sat down for awhile and I thought about what my wants and needs were. I still had a hard time articulating them, even to myself. I made a list of my wants and needs. My list? Pretty short, and not at all focused on objects. The list itself is 6 months old, so it is a little out of date, but includes things like "Improve my self dicipline" and "Finish my Meditation Project".In fact, when Shell asked me what I wanted for my Birthday, I came up with a list of maybe 10 items (most of them being of parivate nature). I wracked my brain for 3 days on that list.
Things are just not that important to me. What I have suffices. My wife, my child, and my friends are way more important. And when I see my wife take sexy good pictures with her sexy good camera and flash, it makes me feel good. It makes me feel good knowing that I help provide for her creative expressions. I love "spoiling" my wife.
Why am I blogging this? Because this brings me to my second point about "want confusion" and its effect on relationships. One of the fundimental issues is that this in-equality can cause strains on a relationship, especially if either, or especially both parties are unaware of what is going on. Once "want confusion" is named however, this issue is diminished; especially if you have a wife who truely cares about you. The other fundimental issue is in how others, especially friends and family, view the relationship. They see the inequality, but do not see what is going on behind it. This puts strain on the whole relationship, both between the two people involved, and the observers because the assumption is that one individual in the relationship is taking advantage of the other.
This ultimately focuses in on the crux of viewing any relationship from the outside. We as a society seem to value an outsiders perspective. At times, the perspective of an outsider can yeild a viewpoint that one has not considered. In the context of an outsider viewpoint of a relationship however, the outsider is working from a flawed perspective. What they don't see is the in-depth, mano-a-womano conversations, the periods of deep joint-introspection, and the conclusions that come from it.
So when I came to this realization, I sat down for awhile and I thought about what my wants and needs were. I still had a hard time articulating them, even to myself. I made a list of my wants and needs. My list? Pretty short, and not at all focused on objects. The list itself is 6 months old, so it is a little out of date, but includes things like "Improve my self dicipline" and "Finish my Meditation Project".In fact, when Shell asked me what I wanted for my Birthday, I came up with a list of maybe 10 items (most of them being of parivate nature). I wracked my brain for 3 days on that list.
Things are just not that important to me. What I have suffices. My wife, my child, and my friends are way more important. And when I see my wife take sexy good pictures with her sexy good camera and flash, it makes me feel good. It makes me feel good knowing that I help provide for her creative expressions. I love "spoiling" my wife.
Why am I blogging this? Because this brings me to my second point about "want confusion" and its effect on relationships. One of the fundimental issues is that this in-equality can cause strains on a relationship, especially if either, or especially both parties are unaware of what is going on. Once "want confusion" is named however, this issue is diminished; especially if you have a wife who truely cares about you. The other fundimental issue is in how others, especially friends and family, view the relationship. They see the inequality, but do not see what is going on behind it. This puts strain on the whole relationship, both between the two people involved, and the observers because the assumption is that one individual in the relationship is taking advantage of the other.
This ultimately focuses in on the crux of viewing any relationship from the outside. We as a society seem to value an outsiders perspective. At times, the perspective of an outsider can yeild a viewpoint that one has not considered. In the context of an outsider viewpoint of a relationship however, the outsider is working from a flawed perspective. What they don't see is the in-depth, mano-a-womano conversations, the periods of deep joint-introspection, and the conclusions that come from it.
Posted by jonnay
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Defined tags for this entry: introspection, shell
Sunday, September 10. 2006
Burning Man 06 - The Music
I loved the music at Burning Man this year. Or rather, I loved the music at our camp. It was filled with spontaneity. We had a couple of Chiko boys camping with us that were guitar players and singers. They had a great sense of humor. My favorite was when Burke would regail us with his "Toadstool" song. I took video of it, for some reason it doesn't sync right though.
Tyler was camping with us and brought his Drum. Joe had his drum too so they shared information back and forth on how to play and taught a little bit to Julie.
One of my favorite moments was when the biggest dust devil ever hit our camp. We were taking turns holding down the shade structure when Tyler started drumming on the top of the uhaul trailer. I joined in from the inside with a kick drum sound. Next thing you know, Dan and Jonnay are playing along. Someone heard one of the neighbors on his bongo playing along with us. It was a ton of fun and a nice reprieve from the stress of the weather.
One night through the tent walls there was a fun round of Row, row, row your boat. I have no idea who we were singing along with.
Before the shade went down, we had a party during the day and dave set up his sound system and turntables. I had a blast spinning there! Hell, when else would I get a chance to spin with my bra showing except there. The only difficult part of the set was when the wind hit and the parachute knocked the monitor onto the turntables. Fortunately I got my hands under there just in time, everything thinks the needle didn't skip at all, but it did a little. I was stuck there yelling until someone finally saw me. Definately a highlight to watch people walking down the street dancing to my tunes and people thanking me for my set.
James, Dave and I played tag team on Friday night when we had a party at our camp. I LOVE to hear Dave spin, even better to play with him. I had never heard James play before, I need a cd from that boy. I just wish I had of been in full control of my faculties that night, cause I sucked hard. Travis got on the decks and Jonnay took control of the eq. It was fun to watch them have so much fun and play like that together.
The next day Dave gave me a dj tutorial. It was extremely helpful. I wish we had of had more time to work on it though.
We had a rave camp down the street a block away from us. I loved hearing their music. I loved the music they played, they played everything that I have on vinyl. The problem was that they had 5000 visitors a day. Which meant, we had to go find new porta potties cause they filled up pretty quick. Ewww.
The only bad thing about the music this year is that I missed seeing Freq Nasty yet again. There is always next year...or the warehouse.
Tyler was camping with us and brought his Drum. Joe had his drum too so they shared information back and forth on how to play and taught a little bit to Julie.
One of my favorite moments was when the biggest dust devil ever hit our camp. We were taking turns holding down the shade structure when Tyler started drumming on the top of the uhaul trailer. I joined in from the inside with a kick drum sound. Next thing you know, Dan and Jonnay are playing along. Someone heard one of the neighbors on his bongo playing along with us. It was a ton of fun and a nice reprieve from the stress of the weather.
One night through the tent walls there was a fun round of Row, row, row your boat. I have no idea who we were singing along with.
Before the shade went down, we had a party during the day and dave set up his sound system and turntables. I had a blast spinning there! Hell, when else would I get a chance to spin with my bra showing except there. The only difficult part of the set was when the wind hit and the parachute knocked the monitor onto the turntables. Fortunately I got my hands under there just in time, everything thinks the needle didn't skip at all, but it did a little. I was stuck there yelling until someone finally saw me. Definately a highlight to watch people walking down the street dancing to my tunes and people thanking me for my set.

Spontaneity Rules! U-Haul Drum Circle!
The next day Dave gave me a dj tutorial. It was extremely helpful. I wish we had of had more time to work on it though.
We had a rave camp down the street a block away from us. I loved hearing their music. I loved the music they played, they played everything that I have on vinyl. The problem was that they had 5000 visitors a day. Which meant, we had to go find new porta potties cause they filled up pretty quick. Ewww.
The only bad thing about the music this year is that I missed seeing Freq Nasty yet again. There is always next year...or the warehouse.
![]() | ![]() |
| Me, before the big shade (and monitor) fell | James on the decks | ![]() | ![]() |
| Xim in the Mix | Jonnay on EQ and Volume, Travis on Beatmixing |
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