Some Canadian researchers have gained insight into the nature of self control, and I find their conclusions fascinating. In a nutshell what they have found is that as humans, our capacity for self control is limited and shallow.

These researchers concocted an experiment where they made the subjects watch animal snuff movies, and one group was told to control their expressions and emotions, and another group was not directed in any way. Afterwards they were given a rapid colour matching test that requires a controlled response. What these researchers found is that the group that were told to suppress their emotions did poorly on the test, compared to those who simply watched the movie.

Apparently though, self control is like a muscle, and we can be trained to get more of it. Just like running a marathon might make it hard for you to walk right after it, it will have a positive effect on your overall endurance.

The interesting thing about this study implies about consumerism and addiction. In the case of consumerism, it suggests that marketers should work harder to test the limits of self control, and put people in a state of "self-control fatigue", as such people will be more prone to impulse buys. This then means that we can expect even more tests of our self control to happen as marketers use this to their advantage. The question then becomes: will we become stronger from a constant overload of self-control tests, or weaker? Sure a runner who runs every day will become stronger. But how about a runner who is forced to run all day, every day?

In the case of addiction this has all kinds of interesting implications. It means that one can work on the general case of self control through simple, measurable exercises, and then use that to apply to the task of overcoming ones object of weakness. This seems like a much stronger, and much more sustainable policy of dealing with addition, rather then through some kind of zero-tolerance style.

Finally, if self control is workable like a muscle, it means that if you work on it daily, you can increase your leel of self control. This of course, takes self control! It's a win-win proposition. Maybe in the future, I'll bblog about tools I have found that help one in such a venture.

(Source: The Futurist)

It has been a long time since I last wrote an entry. There are 2 major forces at work here:

1. I don't have enough time anymore to write entries
2. I twitter stuff that makes good blog entries, because it takes far less time

So I plan on making it up to all my readers, and give you a brain dump of where I am, what I am doing and what I am thinking.

Management

Management is posing to be an exciting, interesting and challenging—erm—challenge. I am slowly starting to get a handle of the job, the responsibilities, etc. The other seniors on the team have been a big help with this. I just keep plugging along and try to learn as much as I can from the people around me.

As part of being I have received a lappy by the evil masters, which is as good, if not better than both my desktop at work and at home. This is hella cool. This of course necessitates the re installation of the "software server stack of doom", code editor, utilities, productivity tools, etc. etc. etc. This is a perfect opportunity for me to make a jump that I have been fighting for a LONG time...

Emacs

I started working with emacs last year, mostly to edit and work with scheme code. What this meant was that I would goto work, edit code in jEdit and then come home, and edit code in emacs. I am a relatively proficient editor-of-code with jEdit, but emacs has always felt really uncomfortable. But since I have to re-install everything anyway, I thought that this would be the perfect time to take the plunge and start using emacs for everything, work and personal projects. I found a relatively decent window distribution, so it is time to make a go of it. I've since found some cool tools, including a Javascript REPL for emacs, as well as instructions to connect Oracle to emacs. The crux here is that I am going to take a bit of a performance hit at work while I get ramped up on working with emacs, but this will also mean I have a good 4-12 hours (depending on my day) to spend on emacs. Basically its time to approach emacs by jumping right into it. Kind of like the best way to learn a whole new language...

Japanese

Learning Japanese has been going well. I have a small selection of manga that I am slowly going through and reading. There is a lot that I miss, but there is a lot to pick up on as well, due to context. I am up into 500 kanji now, with only a 1-4% failure rate. It is really interesting to see a chunk of Japanese text and actually understand a little about what is trying to be communicated on. I still maintain that Japanese is going to be a long-term learning adventure of 10 years. Thank god for my PDA and flashcard software (twinkle), without it there would be no way I could even think about trying to learn this crazy wonderful language. Twinkle lets me define my own flashcards, and practice all of my Japanese wherever and whenever. Very handy for the commute to and from work.

I've been at CM for 1 Year Now.

Kick. Ass.

Okay. First of, let me say that writing a blog entry about managing people is a bit of a head trip. As I eluded to in my previous entry about this new promotion, I have a lot of assumptions and attitudes about what it means to be a manager.

I have no illusions. I am not a good manager yet. I have learned 2 very fundamental pieces of the puzzle here: learning to let go (i.e. delegation) and learning to slow-the-fuck-down. The thing is, everything I am doing, and learning about management is like looking an an elephant in a dark room with a flashlight. I can see bits and pieces everywhere, but what I am looking for is two things:

1. the overall big picture, and
2. the linchpin that holds it all together.

The thing of it is, I cannot really talk about these things without turning into one of those fluffy "personal power" Tony Robbins worshipers that squick me out.

Essentially I am battling two problems, the first is one of ignorance. I know I am ignorant, but I don't even know enough to ask the right kind of questions to erase my ignorance. The second is the stereotypes, prejudices, and attitudes I have about management. So not only do I have a problem with not really being able to ask the right questions, but I also have a problem understanding, and even accepting the answers that I get. I think that the biggest resistance comes from the fact that I want to keep looking at the people I work with as the people I work with, not the people "under" me. I especially want to avoid the kind of attitude where they are not people anymore, but just means for the overlords to get more profit.

What I need is the management equivalent of "Getting Things Done". GTD basically gave geeks the tools they needed to be really geeky about their productivity. I need to find a similar process to get really geeky for managing people.

I just finished the first week as the Senior Web Developer for our team at Critical Mass. Wow. Hard Work. My running joke for the week has been "Whos bright idea was it to take on this job?" This has been an especially difficult week to begin this kind of role: a major project was going live (more on this later) and there was a new employee to take care of. It was very much an out-of-the-pot-and-fat-into-the-fire situation! Luckily for me, the "new" employee has worked there before, and is already quite skilled and knowledgeable, so I didn't really need to hold his hand. On top of that, the already established team leads are nothing but top-freaking-notch, so they were able to help this greenhorn along.

I've already identified the various skill sets I am lacking, and need to improve on. I don't want to fall into the world of management, turning into that balding guy with glasses on the C-Train, reading "Improve your personal power" on his blackberry, whilst listening to Tony Robbins on his MP3 player. Yeuch.

One of the things that has really opened my eyes with this promotion is how I view management culture in general, and all the implicit assumptions I have about workplace culture. It's all very turgid and confused, but the fundamental crux of this introspection is that I need to be enough of a leader to actually lead, but I also need to step back and let the team members shine through as well. It's a whole different level of chainsaw juggling. I plan on taking a very Taoist lead-from-behind style of leadership.

This is such an awesomely amazing opportunity for me to grow as a person—both personally and professionally. I am ready.

I created my own 4 character Idiom: 只寺永自

只 Only
寺 Buddhist Temple
永 Eternity
自 Oneself

The only Buddhist Temple is the Eternal Self

Expect a bunch more as I learn more and more of the Kanji. For now I call them 外人熟語, or "Out Side Person Idioms".

Over on the CBC there is an editorial on Hipster Parenting. It starts out with a description of A book about "Hipster Parenting" and quickly degenerates to "Kids these Days":

People used to raise kids with a sort of quiet stoicism; the fact that humans have been reproducing for millions of years was enough to humble any new breeder. But in this era of unfettered narcissism, child rearing has become a spectacle. The tabloids stalk famous females in search of a �bump� to monopolize the news cycle; Tom Cruise buys his pregnant wife a $200,000 US ultrasound machine for home use; and Oprah exalts celebrity mothers as though having a child is as novel and courageous as space travel. And non-celebs? They bloviate in blogs.

It�s the age of full disclosure, but also the age of prolonged childhood. Due to societal changes � particularly greater permissiveness in the workplace � people are no longer obliged to grow up. They show up at the office in the sort of garb they wore in middle school: sneakers and a hoodie.

Oh Noes! Sneakers and hoodies? It's the end of civil society! This is all highly ironic as I post—bloviate one might say—in my blog whist wearing sneakers, and a hoodie, at work no less. But I digress.

It seems that the main point of the is that in order for one to be a good parent, you have to be a passive little consumer doting on the center of your life. No, not only is it important that you devote your life to your little one, but now you must conform to societies norms as well. "Feel Pollack�s righteous anger, the way he scoffs at old-guard parents and their squareness, their addiction to Raffi, their misguided altruism.". I have news for you Andre, you old-guard parents are square. Your misguided altruism is worth scoff and scorn.

I think that this is highly illustrative of a stark cultural, and perhaps generational divide between Andre and myself. Andre asks: "In 'Notes from a Drunk Aunt,' Lisa Gabriele writes about the freedom of not having to be someone�s role model. What moral are we, as parents, supposed to glean from that?" And to me, there are plenty of moral lessons, like: why do you expect every adult to be a perfect role model? Is it really appropriate to talk down to children? Does my liberalism end when it relates to my daughter, and why should this be so?

So what is this cultural difference between Andre and I? Well it strikes me that Andre comes from the "What to expect in the first years" school of parenting. The style of parenting that claims your child is a beautiful individual special little snowflake that needs your constant care, attention and doting, but only within certain well-defined parameters. Andre complains about this era of "unfettered narcissism", and yet the parenting style that removes our children from the gritty realities of daily life, that encourages them to think they are special, that they really are the primary focus to mommy and daddy causes the unfettered narcissism.

Now don't get me wrong. I love my daughter. Lots. Lots and lots and lots. I don't go to as many all night rave-techno parties any more. I don't spend hours down in my studio,I spend time making castles and running in circles instead. But that doesn't mean I am no longer a musician. The way to raise a well balanced human being is to be a well balanced human being, and being a well balanced human being means maintaining something similar to the lifestyle that I currently live. Are there compromises? Of course! But when a child realizes that they are the center of their parents life, they realize that they can wrap them right around their little finger. I'd rather raise a child who can become an important part of her community based on her own merits, skills and abilities. Harmony is a part of my life, not my whole life.

Andres article ends off with complains about the babble.com website based on what can only be a quick scan of the photos and headlines. If you actually read the articles, Madeline is not complaining about her second, instead, she is expressing a fear that a lot of parents have, and pointing out that average isn't bad. Erin Cressida Wilson is giving a frank look at wanting a girl, but getting a boy, which if you are a perfect "What to Expect..." parent, should never happen. Frankly, it looks as if Babble.com's articles are truthful windows into what it's like to be parents, rather then the bullshit white-picket-fence-and-soccer-mom (pseudo) reality that Andres would have us all "grow up" into.

I'd like to finish off with this quote from babble.com:

What we're hoping to create with Babble is a forum for all the experiences that make having and raising kids in the city so fraught. But we also hope to channel the spirit of all those non-neurotic strangers on the street who greet new parents with nothing but the purest delight.

Yea, sounds like a horrible site to me.